Wednesday, 2 February 2022

What a difference an L makes

 I've had occasion to slag Oatly before because it is fabricated by food engineers and is mostly water . . . and increased in price by 50%! in just 4 years. I'm really sorry to feedback that the Oat Drink made by Flahavan's in Kilmacthomas Up the Déise, is thin gruel compared to Oatly; which is holding its own as original and best for the half of Chez Blob which has gone all dairy-free. 

Clearly Flahavan's has not been alone in witnessing the frothy rise of Oatly huge mark-up and decided cor, we could have some of that. and jumping on the me-too gravy-train. A couple of years ago siblings Philip and Rebecca Rayner who run Glebe Farm Foods, in Cambridgeshire, England, launched their own brand PureOaty and prepared a large chest to store the money as it rolled in. Not so fast, said Oatly's fancy lawyers - you are not only coat-tailing on our great idea, you are also infringing our copyrights and trade-marks. The British courts have now found in favour of Oaty the home-grown producers and sent Team OatLy back to Sweden where they started. It doesn't work like that in tech: if the Rayner's were e-selling some product or service on the Internet, it would be absolutely expected that they'd have an exit strategy involving selling out FAANG and retiring early.

Oatly is in the news for another reason this week having aggravated the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) in Britain. Not content with selling £50,000,000 'worth' of water-with-a-hint-of-oats, Oatly decided to grow their market with a series of ads making exaggerated and inaccurate greenwashing claims about their whitewash. tsk, it's enough to turn a bloke to milk.

Monday, 31 January 2022

HedgeGo

I think it's getting on for 15 years since we hedged and fenced our farmlet against the depredations of the neighbour's cattle. Before that the boundary was marked by a rough boulder-and-stone wall held together by prayer, mud and sceaghs Crataegus monogyna. The back-story is too long to reprise here and I'm no longer bitter-and-twisted about it. Whatevs, the boundary is about 300m long from edge of The Field Over The River to the lane which serves the house . . . and dozens of walkers at weekends. Actually we executed a number of fencing-dependent projects over the space of a couple of years at the end of the 00s.

  • A heritage apple orchard and the very lowest part of the property - the only sliver which falls below 200m above sea-level; which is the advised limit for new-planting hardwoods.
  • Planting the acre = 0.4 hectare of the field between us and the clatter of silver barns which blights the view from the kitchen window. That is a mix of oak Quercus robur, ash Fraxinus excelsior Scot's Pinus sylvestris, larch Larix europaeus,with a leaven of other native trees
  • Planting the said hedge with hawthron sceagh Crataegus monogyna, blackthorn draighean Prunus spinosa and hazel coll Corylus avellana in a 7:2:1 ratio. We also included some standards of ash and wild cherry gean Prunus avium.


All the standards in our hedge got topped when we lent the field to some pals to graze horses who were quite capable of leaning over the wire fence and chomping the apical meristem, so now we have cherry coppice. A couple of weeks ago, when the long dry spell started, I thought it would be a good plan to  chop the blackthorn suckers which are march into the pasture from the roots of the hedgerow trees. Hack hack. Really a good idea to use eye-protection because these things whip around in their death-throes. I was only making desultory progress on the sucker-removal task because the goddam hedge has long since escaped the confines of the sheep-wire fence between hedge and paddock. 

Accordingly, last Tuesday, another fine day, I took saw and loppers and started to cut off the overhanging branches brash off the small stuff and keep anything wider than two fingers for winter fuuuuuel. At it again on Wednesday . . . at it again on Thursday. It looks a bit ragged it has won about 2.5m of mowable, grazable sward for the edge of the field. That might be a couple more bales of haylage - which is money. It's also a neat stack of firewood which just needs to be cut to length and left to air out for a couple of years:


The picture at the top shows the shadow fall of the winter sun at 1045 GMT 27 Jan 22 from which, knowing the height of the sun above the horizon here and then [= about 15°] it would be possible [trigonometry!] to calculate the height of our hedge from the shadow across the grass. And hey, our forest over in the background is doing well. For scale, the holly Ilex aquifolium tree flagged with a pink arrow planted in 2008 at 40cm tall is now 3m tall.

Friday, 28 January 2022

Fetish your Carhartt

Last Summer, my Michigander pal came visiting, in a brief window of covid-opportunity, to see a man about a farm on the other side of the valley. We hung out a bit and walked up the hill and had a nice lunch in the open air, so we didn't kill each other with spittle-bugs. When he was leaving, he kindly presented us with matching his'n'hers quilted gilets very discretely marked with his company logo. We've both worn these handy arms-free, pocket-enriched garments a lot since last July.

Earlier in the week, my youtube feed delivered a piece to camera by Beau of the Fifth Column, a journalist from Virginia who offers sensible down-home commentary about Antics American from his garage / workshop. According to Beau, folks in Middle America are burning their hats in protest that Carhartt, the now global work-wear company [R, as fashion accessory] is insisting that all their employees be vaccinated. This is one variant on a boycott the vaxxers crazy-fest from the anti-vaxx opposition. I was guessing that anti-vaxxers wouldn't own a Carhartt hat - being full equipped with one made of tinfoil . . . but no, it seems that Carharrt was getting to be associated with, say, those fomenting the Capitol Insurrection a year and a bit ago.

Well, it turns out that our gilets are built by Carhartt! It's a wild world when you realise that something quite ordinary, but extra-ordinarily utilitarian and comfy is a) making a down with the hood fashion-statement at the same time as b) waving the flag for prophylactic vaccination. Cue ♬ ♫ ♩ ♪ vaxx me tender, vaxx me dear, tell me you are mine. I tell ya b'ys if Elvis was alive today [and we know he is] he wouldn't be kissing the audience!


Wednesday, 26 January 2022

High bar for the AGM

In many ways, for The Management, it would be handy if nobody turned up to the AGM; assuming the officers and the Board can muster a quorum. That way there are no awkward questions from the floor about that boondoggle in Barbados or the mysterious petty cash haemorrhage. 

Now I believe [credo] in Credit Unions, they are embedded in the local community which is what I aspire to do as well; and so does Goodly Barrow [R] the new local café and museum. But the way our CU runs its affairs is not above criticism. I've had a swipe at them for wheeling out the PP for bidding prayers at the AGM . . . and arranging it so I never won a raffle prize at the several sequential AGMs which I attended in the Before Times. Such inappropriate grand-standing by the majority religion is completely against the aspirations we all want for a multi-cultural inclusive society in modern Ireland. 

And here we go again, same mindset different problem. January is AGM month for a lot of organisations and for reasons this year our Credit Union is doing it by Zoom again. Because the CU is conservative they are trying to make it like the before times sending out the call by letter. Said letter has a 33 page wodge of agenda, minutes, proposals, financials and notes on the financials - as you'd expect. 

Q. How do I register for the event?
A. Easy! Just type this 66 character link into your browser:
https://us02web.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_QZWjY72yRuKs27pvny6euA [naah, don't try it]

WTFinances?!! 1) the link on the page is underlined because link so that makes the _underscore_ in WN_QZ invisible and 2) makes then two y's indistinguishable from v's. Shag me if I'm going to try to type that in correctly or even incorrectly. In my last puck at the CU I said that their practices were excluding muslims and protestants and a certain type of rigid atheist from attending the AGM because a representative of the Bishop of Rome was ex officio going to open proceedings. Here the CU is excluding many from their membership heartland who don't type or have poor sight or just can't be arsed to try keying in a long string of meaningless characters with CAPS lc and digits all clattered up.

But I took one for the team community and phoned in a complaint. 15 minutes later hissonour The Manager called me back and he offered to e-mail me the link as he had got it from the tech company which is running the meeting for the CU. Good so, I got my clickable link but, in the long email-trail, I also got the manager's e-mails [both CU and personal], and the name of the tech company and their Credit Union Liaison Officer's e-mail. GDPR fail! By return, I send them a tinyurl link reducing 66 characters to https://tinyurl.com/123a567b - less than half as long and more than twice as simple / memorable / dictatable over the phone to Olds like me.

Monday, 24 January 2022

Rockstar

Time on Rock: A Climber's Route into the Mountains by Anna Fleming [R on another pinnacle; from her blog The Granite Sea] was only published this month and a) I downloaded it on spec through Borrowbox b) abseiled down through it like a freshet burn. It is a worthy successor to Nan Shepherd's The Living Mountain which I read through Christmas 2020. And indeed, Anna cites Nan for helping to give her a more contemplative and less conquistador view of Britain's high places. It is okay, it is better, just to be in the hills and forget all that macho goal-driven Munro-bagging triumphalism. Nan Shepherd was born about 100 years before Anna Fleming; so the mantel has been passed by proxy and importantly by writing. Fleming is an Eng.Lit. major with a PhD [Thesis: ‘Wordsworth, Creativity and Cumbrian Communities’(2017)], so has a good idea about how to construct a lucid and evocative sentence.

The case is made that although climbing is still largely a man's world, you would be wrong to think that women are not as good . . . because testosterone drives muscle mass; because r e a c h matters; because hormones. This is mostly bollix: women may be less strong but they have less weight to propel upwards. And hormones may give a greater range of affect but that can mean that when women are at the peak it makes men look and feel pedestrian. The Pill, by blandifying the cycle, may put a snaffle on The Best that can be achieved on the rock-face. Deliberate practice on the rock hones the proprioceptive senses: like dancers, climbers [have to] know where each of their extremities are without having to think about it. The thinking [energy sapping in its own way] has to concentrate on the tactics: each of several contingent moves to get to That solid hold. Hearing too: avoid holds which sound hollow when you tonk them with the heel of your hand.

Rock climbing can be a solo sport - Reinhold Messner famously soloed Everest in 1980 - but the smart climbers go with a partner. Someone with whom you develop an empathy and understanding based on shared epic tales and maybe complementary skills. Fleming has climbed with a lot of different people from whom she has learned and whom she has mentored in turn. The writers of climb-guides have a fractal sense of detail: each hairline crack and knob-for-one-foot is given the agency of each roundabout and turning of the AA itinerary from Wexford to Sligo. These writers have the same expertise as Cape Horners - who in a lifetime of salty toil may have rounded that stormy corner only a few dozen times. And indeed the weather matters: a pitch will be different if the rocks are sopping - although sandstone dries quicker than gabbro.

As well as the properties of different rock, Fleming has made the effort to learn the formal geology of the holds on which she depends. Climbers don't need to know that this pitch was laid down during the Caledonian Orogeny 400 million years ago; but it puts them in their place. In one epiphany near the top of Dubh Loch the Universe had appeared and I had lost my position in the centre

 I stared into the sky,
As wondering men have always done
Since beauty and the stars were one
Though none so hard as I.
It seemed, so still the valleys were,
As if the whole world knelt at prayer,
Save me and me alone;
So pure and wide that silence was
I feared to bend a blade of grass,
And there I stood like stone.

There's a bit of a hat-tip to Gwen "space below my feet" Moffat too. 

Okay, you possibly think you don't have 8 hours of ear-time for an homage to rock. Try this interview, though.


Sunday, 23 January 2022

Sun 23r Jan 022

T'ings